The Withdrawn Individuals

[Project Blaze]

Why do you think people always take their clownish crap out on the ones that are withdrawn? For me "easy target" isn't a good enough response, so I was wondering if someone could give me some insight about the whole issue. Does it make them feel better and bigger about themselves? It's pretty pathetic to me, especially since they generally have numbers. But the ones that spread rumors like little b... schoolgirls... are just as, if not more, frustrating. So, like I said I wanted to talk about why shy/withdrawn people are always viewed as dangerous, malleable, gullible, and/or stupid. This has been a thorn in my side ever since I can remember, and just thought I'd put it up in a thread to see what you guys (and girls) think. I hope I didn't put this in the wrong thread though...

[Muffincat]

In my experience as a withdrawn and pretty shy person, I too have had my share of remarks made. Mostly I think a lot of people don't understand what to do with someone who doesn't talk much. I remember I was hanging out with a friend once and we met some new people and I thought it was quite pleasant really but one of the guys told my friend after I left that I was stuck-up o.o and honestly I am so incredibly far from being stuck-up that... wow. But... well, I feel that when you are quiet, people often project their own view of how you feel or think because they don't know what else to do with you. Of course everyone does this to other people to an extent, but I cannot tell you how many times people have jumped to conclusions about how I feel that are truly shocking to me.

I just shrug it off if it is someone I don't know, and correct them if I care about them. There are some people who understand introverts, and others who simply can't or won't. I've had my fair share of being picked on, and personally I don't understand it because I have a lot of compassion and would feel terrible about hurting someone like that... but that's how it is. Sometimes I think it is hard for certain people to understand that other people have emotions and feelings, and often shy people are really quite sensitive... also some people are just pricks.

:)

[Project Blaze]

Took a minute to read all that. Sheesh! O_o But sooner or later if they keep up that behavior towards the shy ones, they'll eventually get extremely confrontational with anyone that does something to them. For me it took years to develop that kind of alteration, for better or worse.

And my brain just isn't cooperating, so that's all I've got for now. :/

[Subb]

i was never really picked on in high school or anything, i guess i was one of the "cool kids" but i had friends who were the quiet ones and ended up being picked on. But when i seen it i was always sure to put a stop to it. I dont believe in punking people down. If u dont have anything nice to say then dont say anything. But i am also like muffin, i have a big heart and im much more of a lover than a hater and would do anything to help someone before myself. But i couldnt count the times my high school friends started **** with sumone for no reason and i stood before them and told them to quit it. Or that they ripped the books out of sumones hands and there papers and everything went all over the floor and i stopped and helped him/her pick them all up in a crowded hallway.

[BobTD]

I wont get into the hell that was high school. But I don't know what muffin is saying about the way people handle quiet people.

I actually got talked to once by a teacher who said she had a complaint that I was frightening someone who I had never talked to (and I'm kind of short, and small to). even though I was withdrawn and quite and often made fun of, anyone who ever talked to me knew that I just had trouble making friends, but really wanted to make them.

I think I have been to seven different schools. Not counting the time I was home schooled. But ever school I went to seemed the same. Only one or two people ever got to know me, the rest avoided me.

As for bullies, I guess I have a hard time with social ques so I attracted them like flies at first. But after you stand up to them they either think your crazy or dangerous. No one really called my bluff ever so I cant remember being in a serious fight.

[RaiDae]

....well... i feel i should put my penny in... even if it is the opposite of what you just said....
In my experience, it was the loud, hyper kids who got picked on... aka, me. The quiet kids were mostly just left alone... And when the quiet kids did get picked on, they always seemed to take it in their stride... ignore the stuff that was being said. Also, it seemed that if a withdrawn kid was picked-on, other people would jump to their aid... pity probably.

[Muffincat]

well I think the excitable hyper kids get picked on as well, Rai. I knew a few who also did. But I know no one ever came to my aid in school :P There was a group of people who sat near us who threw rocks at as once and almost beat up my friend really bad oO Or I mean... yeah I have a lot of examples but I don't want to go into them.

But yeah, I think both ends get the brunt of it... but it does kind of just depend. I think one of the loud excitable girls got it worse than me... but I was friends with certain people in school who were "popular" or whatever and everyone hated her... but. Yeah. So. It depends I guess, but ... I dunno.

[thedeparted]

Insecurity about themselves so they must put down others to make themselves seem fit in with the in crowd.